The journey to developing Logan's character started with a little bit of inspiration from someone very close to me. There's this boy, and his parents don't have the best relationship. They don't want to get divorced, but they don't get along at all. Really, they've stayed together for the sake of the children, but in my eyes, I don't see that as being very beneficial to the children at all.
I took this and applied it to Logan Brown. My idea was that Logan was surrounded by people choosing to settle into their lives. They take whatever is handed to them and deal with it. His parents, for example: they refuse to separate and make themselves happy. They feel as if they are stuck, and their excuse is to allow Logan to have two parents in his life, making things are normal as possible. But would it not be better to have two happy parents apart than two miserable parents together? This is something that has always bothered me, seeing it for myself in the lives of people I know. I wanted to reflect that into my book somehow, so that's why I chose to apply it to Logan's life.
When Logan is first introduced in Ninety Degrees, he gives off the same vibe as Paxton from Small Circles. I wanted the reader to see those similarities but also eventually come to realize that he's much different. Death has followed Paxton his entire life. First with his father, then his grandmother, and eventually with Owen. Paxton feels as these events are completely out of his control. They are, of course, because life happens. But what Paxton doesn't understand is that he can take the initiative to make his own life worth while. Live it to the fullest, instead of sinking into a hole of depression. Logan Brown has this same issue. He feels as if the life he was born into was out of his control, and instead of making the best of it, he settles just like his parents. He settles into something that he thinks will never change, and eventually grows accustomed to that. This is what makes him different: he depends on that normalcy so much that eventually he develops a fear that it will change.
Logan settles for not doing well in school, because so far putting in that extra effort hasn't gotten him anywhere. He settles for working as a drug mule, because it's easy and it's there. He settles for not fighting for the girl he loves, because he'd rather have her in his life as a friend than to lose her completely. The biggest change we see in Logan is his ability to let Charleigh in. Yes, he was scared to dive into something so serious. Yes, he'd never looked at her that way before, so it was difficult. But what it really comes down to is this: Logan has a fear of change.
I imagined Logan's parents having those same fears. That's why they choose to stay together and be miserable versus seeking something different. They've settled because they don't know anything else. For Logan, all he's known are his two best friends. Charleigh and Silas have always been just that. Friends. Not only has Logan never been in a serious relationship before, but he's never considered Charleigh to be a candidate for such. Jealousy is what it takes for him to see the light. Opening his heart and falling for someone is the hardest thing Logan will ever do. In order to be with her, he has to accept the idea that things might not work out. He has to acknowledge that taking a leap is more worthwhile than standing still. This is what I love most about Logan's character growth. He takes the ultimate leap, doing something he would have never done for anyone else. He becomes that person, a "boyfriend" for Charleigh, complete with flowers and candles. She's the only girl that could have ever made him do something so unnatural to his typical behavior, and that's why they are a perfect match.
-Megan.
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